You wake, and for an instant life is perfect, because you know no pain,
no emotion, no touch, no feelings. You know nothing but existence, and I wonder what it would be like to live in that eternal moment. And yet
then life floods back to you in a wave of crushing terror, and you remember why you are awake... the dreams, the nightmares. Images, distorted time. Distorted life. Mimics of cruel days gone by that you wish you could repeat, wish you could call out "Do over!" like when you were so small and everything was right with the world.
The only thing that comes with age is the knowledge that nothing is right with the world.. and there is nothing anyone can do to fix it.
Happy birthday to me. (February 1)