A dominant hand lies between the sheets, flexing and twitching with restrained emotion. Light and dark mixing in shadows, shapes twisting and turning in circles and hazy happiness escapes me... I dream, slow, smooth dreams like the flow of a tiny brook newly born into this world, of being safe and warm, of happiness that eludes me - butjustbarely - and of a warm bed with the promise of a new tomorrow with twin hearts.
And I wake.
A torrent of nightmares that are only memories and wishes flood through my mind like a raging river, knocking me down over and over until the will to get up one more time is removed. I wake, to cold sweats trickling down my spine like painful rain, trembling violently... I wake, to an empty bed, an empty heart, an empty mind.
Staring into the darkness, I wish for the darkness to envelope me.