Everyone that I care for so much (I'd give my LIFE for you, don't you KNOW that?!) are on these journeys of self discovery, these vagrant paths of learning by which I am left behind. I stand alone as I watch them walk off, smiling brightly to hide the blade in my palm, so that the shine in my eyes will outweigh the glitter of salvation. I feel so empty; lifeless; a doll, a shell, forever thrown aside when it becomes inconvenient to pursue a course and carry her along (who cares for me? who cares about my needs, my desires? i've forgotten that everyone looks out for themselves, not others). Listening to "Promises" by Megadeth, a song that wrenched my soul and now I can only listen to the music, not the words. Feeling the weight of my heart in my chest, a tangible being that screams for release.
And I wonder how it continues to beat through this, when we both know that no one would mind if we left.