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U is for Urge!
::1:10 am::28.06.04::

urge

v.

1. To force or drive forward or onward; impel.

2. To entreat earnestly and often repeatedly; exhort.

The urge to give up is becoming overwhelming. I feel so incredibly defeated and hopeless at times. It's like the world is ending and there's nothing left for me here. I wake blindly and gaze into the darkness, seeing nothing but the desire and the effort and the fact that there's way too much. WAY too much. I can't deal with this stress anymore. And the urge is getting to me. I hate myself for this - I hate myself for spending a week whimpering, terrified that my mother will find out what I do to myself and here I am...

I want to bleed.


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